He's struggling with that last part, at the moment. During the tour he did pretty well at not letting himself slow down enough to mope at any point - staying pumped up enough about himself that most things didn't get through his skin. Somehow the tour ending feels like it's caused him to lose a lot of that momentum. Maybe because they're performing less. He doesn't know.

"I dunno...I want to write something actually good about some stuff that happened last night and..." He trails off. So much of it he just hits a mental roadblock on. Just like he did when they were actually happening. "There's some stuff where it's like...I don't even know..."

It takes a long time for him to surrender this last part.

"Why I did it."