interstellar5555 | (open) do you know how far this has gone?

Who:Terry and YOU
What: Someone regained the ability to sense fears and is furiously trying to ignore it
When:Feb 22nd
Where:Pride HQ/out and about
Warnings: None yet, will update as needed.

PRIDE HQ

[It's a lot to wake up to-- Terry can't decipher it at first, but it feels familiar and uncomfortable all the same. This deafening noise in his head it's a struggle to think through.]

[Eventually he drags himself to the café, thinking maybe he's just going stir crazy from staying in the penthouse all the time. He brings a notebook and his loudest headphones, sitting with his soup and the loudest music he has to hand. Maybe he can work through it. Maybe he just needs something to focus on.]

[Or maybe not.]

[It fucking hurts. Like something's screaming for his attention and he can't pick it out of the noise.]

[He kinda just ends up spending more time with his head in his hands then he does writing or eating.]

THE GREAT OUTDOORS

It's gotta be the building right. Enough weird shit goes on in there that it's not so out there he'd be hearing things. All he knows is he has to get away from it.

But it just follows.

Terry's walking aimlessly when he catches something he's absolutely not in the mood to deal with right now. ”Hey, isn't that the guy from Cosmic Indulgence?” “Yeah, Trauma. Hey! Trauma! We love your band!!!”

Why do these things happen to good people?

He's more than happy to entertain fans most days, but right now? His skull feels like it's splitting and he kinda hates everyone in the world right now. But he puts on his game face anyway.

It's somewhere in the sudden onslaught of selfies and autographs that there's this… Moment of clarity. One of them is being particularly obnoxious and it's like he zeroes in on them, totally blanks out until they're yelling about ‘how cool it is’ and asking how he knew. Apparently like an idiot he drew a bee with his autograph and a dumb comment about nightmares.

At least he didn't freak anyone out? But they're all clamouring for his attention and backing up with stuff about how he needs to go isn't doing much.

Someone help?

[Prose or brackets welcome! HMU over PM or @

FiremanSam if you have something else you'd like to do!]

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[He doesn't because he's considerate. Not unless Terry's brand of "aggressively getting as close as possible and clinging like a terrified koala" cuddling is gonna wake him anyway.]

[When Maxxie wakes up, he looks around with a tired frown as he starts to realize where he is.]

What time is it? Did you sleep?

I don't know.

[He literally hasn't moved the entire time, and it's kind of hard to check the time with his face pressed into Maxxie's chest.]

What do you mean?

[He'd move but Terry is on him so tightly.]

Terry, what's going on?

I just-- I just want this for a little while. [He sucks in a deep breath, voice a bit shaky as he keeps talking.] Everything else is so shit. I don't want to think about it.

[Maxxie's eyebrows knit together and he frowns anxiously at Terry's head, putting a hand on his back.]

Okay, but... you're making me worry, Ter. Can't you tell me what's wrong?

What isn't?

[Terry loosens the ridiculous grip he has on Maxxie, but he doesn't move. He shakes his head and makes a noise that could easily be a laugh or a sob, maybe even both. Whatever it is, it sounds about as bitter and tired as Terry feels right now.]

Richard's gone, Nariko's gone. I'm working for a woman who has some kind of fucking torture chamber downstairs, and I'm pretty sure I'm not who I think I am. [a heavy sigh] Now I'm hearing things too, so. I'm pretty sure I'm actually fucking crazy.

[Maxxie's silent for a moment, rubbing Terry's back as he tries to think of what to say. He doesn't know how to handle all of this; he's seen some stuff but he knows Terry's had it worse.]

...what do you mean, you're hearing things? What are you hearing?

It's--

[It's insane is what it is. Terry withdraws himself from Maxxie, pulling his arms in to wrap them around himself instead. There's not as much space as he'd like to curl into himself, and he can't quite bring himself to physically push Maxxie away, but he does what he can to separate them. Give Maxxie an easy exit.]

Look, I know you didn't sign up for this shit. I'm not gonna hold it against you if you want to leave.

[Maxxie sits up, putting his weight on one hand so he can look down at Terry with his anxious frown getting even deeper.]

I'm not going anywhere. I told you we'd get through the weird shit together, alright?

[He puts his hand on Terry's shoulder, rubbing his thumb back and forth.]

You're not getting rid of me that easily.

You also said that I'm not as fucked up as I think I am.

[His eyes are closed, he doesn't want to look up and see whatever look it is Maxxie has on his face. Whatever it is, Terry can't shake the feeling he'll hate it. That it'll hurt because he's fucked up, broken, damaged goods and he's kept it hidden this long, but now it's out there for Maxxie to see and--]

[Fuck.]

Turns out I'm way more fucked up than I imagined.

[Maxxie doesn't know what to say. He just wants Terry to stop thinking these things but he has no idea how to make this happen. After a moment of silence, he lies back down, pressing himself to Terry's back and wrapping an arm around him tightly. His voice is shaking when he speaks, muffled because he's pressing his forehead to the back of Terry's neck.]

You're not, okay? We're gonna get through whatever this is. We're gonna be alright.

[Oh-- Oh god.]

[Terry takes a deep breath and presses a hand to his eyes, trying to will himself not to cry. He's just so tired and scared and this is so much better than he deserves. He lets out a shaky breath, voice small and weak.]

I'm sorry.

[If anything, that just reinforces the idea that he has to be here, that Terry needs him here. He sighs, pressing his cheek to Terry's back, and his voice is more steady.]

It's okay. You don't have to be sorry.

[He feels like he should though. For bringing this shit into Maxxie's life, for not being able to handle it better. For being whatever he is in the first place.]

Fuck-- I just... [His voice catches in his chest and Terry sucks in another breath, murmuring a couple more quick apologies.]

You don't have to talk about it if you can't right now.

[If anything Maxxie kind of wishes he wouldn't, as selfish as that is. This is hard. It's too hard and he doesn't want to mess it up and lose Terry because he did the wrong thing.]

[Terry nods, staying still where he is and taking a few deep breaths to try and calm himself down a little. He feels terrible - fucking guilty, even - and he wants to thank Maxxie for staying, but he's worried that if he opens his mouth, something awful is gonna come out.]

[Maxxie sighs and takes his arm from around Terry to rub his arm, soothing and trying to help him calm down. He wants to tell him something reassuring, but nothing comes to mind right now. Nothing seems good enough.]

[Terry lets out a shaky breath and presses himself back a little against Maxxie. He doesn't need words right now anyway, just to cool down long enough he can thing about this sensibly with his head on right. He just needs this, the feeling of warmth and safety he always gets with Maxxie.]

(open) do you know how far this has gone?

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