interstellar5555 | Locked in a Room

[ ... yes, that is definitely helping. Alec's breathing has already shifted to match the repeat of Richard's fingers on his skin. He hasn't noticed. ]

There's only one way to find out.

[ Alec is imagining the best parts of something else entirely. Something wilder, heads thrown back and eyes shut tight, although, right now, his eyes are wide open, pupils dilated. ]

[ He's so alluring, like that. Except Richard has some idea just how drunk Alec is, and how he'll probably not even remember at all anything about tonight, and that helps keep things under a lid.

Richard smiles, not breaking contact, but giving just a little bit of distance. Not cold, and not rejection.

Maybe making Alec chase him, a little bit - with no running at all involved - or maybe giving him a slightly different kind of a fight to win. ]

Do you always rush headlong in whatever catches your fancy, Alec? [ Richard's voice is too warm, too smooth, to be a criticism. Just a fond question, that he actually kind of does want to know the answer. ]

[ The withdrawal is too subtle for Alec to pick up on at the present. He smiles back. His is tinged with smugness at the question, but with genuine warmth beneath it. He isn't ashamed of that. ]

Yes. Waiting is for everyone else. Vices are only pleasures that everyone else doesn't have the money for. I do what I want, when I want it.

[ His smile falters, eyebrows creeping together into a small scowl. He is not, in fact, doing what he wants right now. He is cooped up like everyone else. Alec decides that they aren't talking about that right now.]

Do you always hold back when you want something?

Vices, [ easily, even if his hand tightens a little around Alec's ] are pleasures that your destroy your body too fast, and it fails you when you need it. Even if your mind is what you value about yourself, it's good to be able to rely on what you've been given.

And I don't hold back. I may lie in wait until I know how things stand, because I enjoy watching people, but - when I'm told somebody's not interested, I won't push.

[ Even if he's giving different signals now, but the decision made when Alec was - presumably - more sober, sober enough to be able to say no even by not showing up, that carries more weight than inebriated desire. ]

I would rather die happy and drunk at sixty than live to a wizened old hundred reeking of piss and camphor.

[ Being only 19, sixty sounds like a ripe enough old age. His hair would be gray, his belly wouldn't tolerate alcohol nearly as well, and his fingers would be beginning to stiffen when he tried to shake a pair dice in them. What a dismal age, he thinks, and it would only get worse. ]

Someone told you they weren't interested? I don't believe it for a minute.

Being drunk isn't prerequisite for dying happy at sixty. There are better ways to be happy. And feel good about it.

[ But he's laughing a little. Richard doesn't care when he'll die. It's living fully that matters to him, and wasting it to mindlessness, like with alcohol and drugs, just doesn't sit well with him...

For himself. Everyone's free to destroy his or her body as they choose.

His eyebrow goes up towards his hairline, though. His tone remains light, though there may be the hint of an edge to it. Mostly a mocking one of, you don't remember? ]

Well, somebody was supposed to tell me he was interested by showing up someplace, and he didn't. What can you do?

Edited (minor fixes) 2015-12-02 23:44 (UTC)

I feel splendid. I wouldn't dream of changing what's working so well.

[ If one can afford mindlessness, why bother with anything else? Alec thinks he would enjoy an endless life of diversion.

He could do with some right now, after that veiled accusation. It made his body seize up, and his movements were deliberate and overly delicate as he reaches over with his free hand to peel Richard's hand from his own. ]

I would find out if there were any extenuating circumstances before taking revenge in the form of leading someone on in a bar like a common whore.

[ If Alec expected to get a rise out of Richard with that word, he was getting a sad disappointment. Richard's usual half smile quirked his lips, and only his eyes got a little more opaque than usual. ]

There's quite some ground to cover between distracting and leading on. As a clever person, you're surely aware of the fact.

[ He leaned back, taking the alcohol with him, but only toying with the stem of the glass. ]

Extenuating circumstances or not, I can take a no as such. It doesn't mean I'm less interested, after all. [ Which was why he was trying to stop the drinking tonight before Alec actually passed out. ] Only that my actions will be... Well. Nothing that you'd worry about in the morning, if you're the kind to worry about things in the morning.

[ It wasn't even Alec's motions that got Richard to pour out an unusual amount of words, for him. Those green eyes could look far too vulnerable, if one was close enough to notice. ]

[ Alec scoffs a laugh and doesn't try to hide that it's at Richard, who seems to have missed Alec's carefully crafted pretense of not caring at all what other people think. It is a bother, though, that other people do care about it. ]

I'm not worried about things now. Why would I be any more concerned about them in the morning?

[ He motions at the bartender, indicating that he wants two more of the stolen drink, now in Richard's hand. It... irks him, that Richard hasn't asked what the extenuating circumstance might be. No, he doesn't care. He doesn't care what people think of him, not even Richard St. Vier. ]

[ Bothered by the laugh Richard is not. Bothered by the order of more alcohol, maybe a little. But the wrinkle between his eyebrows is very small. His voice remains bland and polite. ]

Better light. Clearer view. More perspective, sometimes.

[ Okay, yes, the blandness at making that suggestion is loaded with a lot of self-mockery, as a matter of fact, but he still keeps to it, mostly.

And of course he wants to know. He just doesn't think asking now will do any good. Between alcohol and contrariness. But Richard St. Vier is very good at getting the right beat, the right timing. ]

[ If Richard didn't want him to drink more, he could have carried Alec out of the bar. That is about the only way to stop this, because the bartender is clearly following Alec's orders and fixing the drinks. ]

Not under the cloud of a hangover until I get a greasy breakfast and spiked coffee. The order is malleable. Once I've had the coffee, though, the view gets nicely smudged into a haze where everything is more attractive. All the nasty bits smooth out and the day just slides into the night... although I'll admit sometimes a few important things slip away.

[ Like the name of the bar that he was supposed to meet Richard at. Alec never did remember it. ]

[ He could have, but he was still at the time acting under the impression of a 'no.' That doesn't suggest that something like that won't be met with serious struggle, and, well.

He wants to stop self-destruction, not ruin everyone's fun. The poor resident of Pride Tower currently are having enough trouble, they don't have to deal with this.

Now, on the other hand... ]

Breakfast and coffee sound good. The haze... why is everything unattractive without it? We're living the life, after all.

[ Not that he expects an answer, but... he's curious. ]

Are you inviting yourself over for breakfast?

[ Alec's smile is smug-veiled delight at the way Richard walked into that. He's not delighted enough to answer the question directly, because he can't explain that he feels vaguely empty inside for no discernible reason without sounding pathetic. Alec is not one to cry about needing meaning in his life. ]

Maybe. Or maybe inviting you for breakfast. [ Deadpan, but yes, he's heard this and that down the grapevine. ] I fight less with my bandmates than you with yours. Less likely for the breakfast to turn unpleasant.

[ That's the reason and no other. Nothing like teasing right back. ]

Your breakfast must be dull.

[ Alec fiddles with his new drink. He hasn't sipped it yet, because the conversation is slippery. He's already having a hard time keeping hold on it; Alec suspects he doesn't have the upper hand. ]

Can I fight with your bandmates?

[ Well that gets Alec a small huff of laughter. ]

I don't know, can you avoid fighting with my bandmates? Just out of curiosity.

[ A genuine answer would require serious thought that he is incapable of. ]

I suppose it's too much to hope for that they are exactly like you in comportment and appearance.

[ No, but the compliment works. The good smile flashes through Richard's face, before he goes mock-thoughtful. ]

Like quintuplets? Real or fake, now that's a concept for a band.

[ A terrible thought has occurred to him. ]

No, I wouldn't like it. I'd want all five of you.

[ As Richard is only partially able to guess the thoughts, he's not sure if that means 'all five of Richard' or 'all five of Cosmic Indulgence', so he teases, ]

Great tactics to make me feel special and unique.

Locked in a Room

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