interstellar5555 | ☆TRACK IV: COME TOO FAR

Entry tags:

☆TRACK IV: COME TOO FAR

Who: Everyone!
What: Something explodes in the distance. In a figurative sense.
When: November 6th.
Where: Anywhere you are.
Warnings: ???

“Like the legend of the Phoenix,
All ends with beginnings,
What keeps the planets spinning,
The force from the beginning.”

☆COME TOO FAR

On November 6th, the sudden lockdown of Pride Records and Virgo Entertainment finally ends. But not before some unseen actions have their consequences.

Due to the nature of the conflict, none of you can be there to see it, but that doesn't mean it can't be felt. In the morning of the 6th, something cries out to you spiritually - like the voice of a guardian angel, or a haunting ghost. Something, somewhere, is calling on you for aid. Pleading for you to lend it your power.

Whether or not you consciously agree, you'll feel a connection stronger than anything you've felt up till this point, like whatever this creature is is somehow in the room with you, or maybe like you're with it. What happens next depends on your alignment.

► LOVE & HOPE: All at once, characters with these alignments will feel as if they have taken a deep, spiritual blow - much like having someone clasp their hand around your "soul" and attempt to snuff it out. The attack itself will be brutal but brief. It's the after effects that linger, which may be any of the following:

1) Lingering spiritual pain that triggers symptoms akin to a fever in the body. It may also trigger effects such as nosebleeds and other signs of intense stress.

2) Forgetting everything except the memories you've regained.

3) A feeling of being desperately alone. How your character reacts to this feeling can vary, but the most common response will be seeking comfort from anyone nearby, even if you are not usually the sort of person to do that.

These effects will last from anywhere as short at 15 minutes to as long as 5 hours. You can pick more than one of these effects for a character, but try to balance the potency of each if you take more than one, so you aren't completely kicking the shit out of them. Vestiges of these effects can linger throughout the rest of the day, but in a significantly reduced capacity.

► DUTY & PASSION: All at once, characters with these alignments will feel an intense sense of fear and grief, as if they have lost something extremely precious to them. Generally speaking, this will manifest as a sort of panic or desperation to save whatever that thing is - but not being entirely clear on where they have to go or what they have to do to accomplish it. This can very well trigger some brash and irrational actions as they sort out this abrupt feeling of urgency.

1) Soon after the feeling begins, affected characters will feel empathically drawn to the characters suffering from the effects listed for Hope & Love, even if they are not normally the sort to be so concerned for others. This can go as far as having them be aggressively protective to the point that they will conflict with each other over it.

2) Along with that feeling of being drawn to protect them, all characters will feel an intensified kinship with all the other player characters - from both labels. This feeling of kinship won't cause them to know anything more about each other than they did before, but it will cause them to feel like much closer friends than they actually are.

These effects will last from anywhere as short at 15 minutes to as long as 5 hours. After that period has ended, all these empathetic effects will fade off on their own.

Any network posts made in the chaos will be deleted by the execs after the 5 hours period has closed, if not sooner. By the end of the day, Lesedi Santiago and Edward Blanche will announce their return, and bans from leaving HQ will be lifted.

They will not acknowledge the events of the morning unless someone goes to ask them about it.

“We've come too far 
to give up who we are.
So, let's raise the bar 
and our cups to the stars.”

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

A - JAMIE HAS AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS: (open to bandmates)
The feeling that swamps him when he gets ahold of himself enough to sit up in bed is nothing really new - it's something of which he lives in subconscious fear every day, that he can feel snapping at his heels if he slows down in his headlong sprint through life, but it's never been this intense, this suffocating. It's so quiet, so deathly silent that he can't tell if anyone else is still awake or around or alive other than him. He feels suddenly as though he might be the only living creature in the penthouse, in the entire building, in the whole of the known universe.

He's never felt this profoundly, cripplingly alone.

Frantic, he throws back the covers, flings open the bedroom door; lurches out to the dim hallway to fumble with the doorknob to one of the other rooms. It doesn't matter which one, as long as someone is there that he can see and talk to.

He all but bolts into someone's room - doesn't give a shit if they're awake, asleep, what they're currently involved in - and says, with a rushed, low intensity, "Dude are you awake can I hang out here for a while?"

B - JAMIE TAKES HIS EXISTENTIAL CRISIS ON THE ROAD: (open to anyone in Pride HQ)
He doesn't feel quite so desperately lonely anymore, just overwhelmed and a little embarrassed by the intensity of his own emotions, so at some point in the day he slips out of the penthouse to roam the rest of the building, just like the five days prior. He has to stop a lot more frequently today, though, since every now and then he's staggered by exhaustion and lightheadedness, to say nothing of the bone-deep, teeth-rattling chills. More often than not, when he's stopped somewhere, he's nursing some kind of hot drink, alcoholic or otherwise.

Edited (consistency motherfucker) 2015-11-10 03:59 (UTC)

When Sora wakes up, everything hurts. There's vague fuzzy memories that something weird has happened to him recently, though he can't get a grasp on it enough to put words to it. If asked, he probably wouldn't even be able to speak of it. Beyond that, there's a clenching around his heart and his head. It feels like someone's crying for his help. But he can't focus enough to help, he would if he could. So he just sits there and holds his head for a long while before it's finally subsided enough that he can check his phone.

...That also takes a while, there was quite a lot he'd missed. He's not even sure what day it is now. At least this is his room, right? There's a lot missed from Jamie, and by the time he gets to the end of the texts and has listened to the voicemail, all of that hurt has come back again. But he has to find Jamie.

He stumbles out of bed. He's still in the clothes he was wearing when those guards had come to get him, though he only makes note of this kind of vaguely then promptly forgets about it. He makes it to his bedroom door, throws it open--

--and Jamie's standing there. He looks about as crappy as Sora feels. So Sora just drops his phone on the floor and hugs him.

"I didn't leave on purpose, I wouldn't do that-- I wasn't ignoring you. I don't..." There's a small sob, unintentional, tears unintentional, he brings a hand up to cover his eyes. Everything hurts. "I don't even know what day it is..." Even quieter: "I'm sorry."

Jamie's just reaching for the doorknob when it flies open seemingly of its own accord, and then he's staring at Sora. Sora, who's been gone for the past - how many days has it even been? Too many. So many that Jamie, irrationally or otherwise, was starting to fear the worst. His expression brightens, just for a split second, in amazement and relief -

- and then Sora is clinging to him, and sort of babbling into his shoulder, and - fuck is he crying? Is Sora actually crying right now?

There's a split second where Jamie's not sure how to respond to any of this, it's all so far outside the realm of his experience. He's used to light physical contact from his bandmates - the casual arm around the shoulders, the friendly nudges and jabs, the occasional bout of being literally cheek-to-cheek for some photo shoot or another - but this is probably the first time any of them has outright hugged him. Let alone hugged and cried on him.

Jamie just stands there for a moment or two, and then - kind of stiffly and gingerly, like he's not really sure he's doing this right - puts his arms around Sora and gives him a tentative pat on the back. "...it's okay," he manages, after a beat. Then he repeats, more surely, "It's okay. Don't be sorry."

The crying stops just as quickly as it had started, and he pulls back to wipe his tears away hurriedly with his hand. It was easy to tell he'd made Jamie uncomfortable, which was the last thing he wanted. "Sorry." Right, 'don't be sorry.' "I mean--" He laughs slightly, and there's a very small smile here now, even if his eyes are still wet.

He may have stopped hugging him, not wanting to keep him feeling so awkward, but he's still holding Jamie's arm like he can't stop at least some contact. Like he's afraid they'll get separated without warning. The contact is just reassuring, especially after that moment of pretty much despair he'd woken up with. It was still lingering, a darkness he couldn't quite shake. But this helped.

"...are you feeling better now? You got-- You were really upset... On the phone..." It also seemed like maybe he'd been upset while coming here, though he hadn't missed the look of relief on Jamie's face at seeing him. "I didn't mean to do that, to upset you. I didn't see my phone until just now, though." He lets out a breath of relief, tension finally falling from him a bit. "I don't really know how long I was gone, or what-- But I'm glad to be back. It feels really good to be back."

Jamie's a little startled when Sora pulls away, and though a part of him wants to grin and roll his eyes and say Sora, you dork at that feeble little laugh, he's too worried - and at the same time, too relieved - to do so. He's not complaining about the hand on his arm; honestly, he wouldn't have been too fussed if the guy had kept on hugging him. Like Sora, he finds the contact vastly and inexplicably reassuring.

He only kind of barely remembers the last handful of texts he sent (and has no memory at all right now of the voicemail, which is probably fortunate), but he dismisses Sora's concern with a shake of his head, frowning as he peers at him in the dim light.

"Don't worry about me. You're the one who vanished for days on end." His frown deepens. "What do you mean, you don't know how long you were gone?"

Right. That. Sora opens his mouth to speak, his first inclination to do so, to share everything that he can remember with Jamie because he's possibly his best friend here and why shouldn't he? And yet something also stops him, and there's an audible wince as his free hand comes up to hold his head... Then he has to bring the other one up too, and he sort of just... falls to the carpet on his knees like this.

"I don't--" What if they're listening, what if they hear him talking about it and it happens again? What if they take him away from his band again, do... whatever it is they did. Then there's also some distant voice in his head telling him it's unnecessary to speak about it, no one needs to know. Whatever's happening in his mind, Sora's clearly struggling.

"Maybe I... Maybe I passed out or something? I was in Lesedi's office and we were talking, but that's the last thing I can remember." He finally looks to Jamie again, his hands falling away from his head. Instead, his arms wrap around himself now, almost of their own accord. He'd told the truth, that's what he remembered, even if there were... vague images of other things, screens and indicators, metal and machines... and pain. But they were distant and hard to reach... And unnecessary? "It doesn't matter. I'm back, I'm here. It doesn't matter." He keeps shaking his head now.

Jamie's brow furrows at that wince, and then suddenly Sora just collapses to the floor and Jamie is overwhelmed by something like panic. He's on his knees, too, before he knows it, peering worriedly at the other boy.

Questions keep spinning through his head - You talked to Lesedi Santiago? What about? What did she say? Did she do something to you? - but he can't give voice to any of them through the dismay and worry of seeing Sora like this. Sora, who's usually so happy and carefree and rarely bothered by anything, curled up on the floor, muttering and shaking his head, looking like he's just come back from a war zone.

"Hey - "

Jamie hesitates just a moment, and then shifts around so he's sitting beside Sora, sliding one arm around his shoulders. Again, the gesture is tentative, unpracticed, but it's genuine, a real attempt at offering comfort. "...don't force yourself. Maybe it'll come back later. Don't worry, it's okay. You're home now, we'll take care of you, you're okay..."

It's good that Jamie doesn't ask those questions. Sora's not sure if he could bring himself to answer. There's too much conflict inside of him: part of him saying it doesn't know the answers, part of him saying it knows but doesn't want to share, part of him saying it can't share even though he really does want to. And a question of his own bubbles up to the surface, dissipating into thin air before it reaches his lips: so which part is really me?

But everything feels calmer with the proximity of someone else, and he finds himself leaning into Jamie's touch, relaxing somewhat, turning his face to rest his forehead against the other boy's temple.

"Yeah." It's a response breathed out more than spoken or whispered, and he closes his eyes to fight off more tears. "Why..." He takes in a breath then, and lifts his head to meet Jamie's eyes.

"You were there when I opened the door."

There's curiosity in his tone, so it could be taken as an actual question. And yet it's also Sora stating what he's just realized, and feeling grateful for it, relieved. It carries in it a lot of emotion, and unlike the previous two words he'd spoken that were light, mere wisps, there and gone again... these ones lay heavy in the air. They're solid, and noteworthy.

He'd been headed to Jamie's room anyway, but somehow immediately seeing him just upon opening the door, when he'd been looking for him and wanting to see him, desperate to make sure he was okay, that he was there. Seeing Jamie's face just like that had not only been reassurance that everything was (relatively) normal, that the people Sora cared about were safe and right where he'd left them... It also felt like a gift.

And there may be a tear or two welling up again, but at least now he's smiling.

Sora's head pressed against his is an oddly intimate gesture, and part of Jamie feels uncomfortable with it and unsure what to do but the rest of him feels so much more at ease like this, taking as much consolation from the touch as he is giving it, so he remains still, letting Sora try to calm himself. He can feel Sora's breath on his neck, tickling, and he stifles the reflexive urge to squirm.

When Sora finally raises his head Jamie turns to look at him...and he finds that he's not really sure how to respond to that comment. It sounds like a simple observation, but there's query in it too, and something more, something significant. Jamie can sense that much, but he can't quite grasp what the significance might be, what Sora's trying to convey. He looks almost grateful, though, like Jamie'd done something special for him when really, it'd just been a fluke that he'd wound up at Sora's door in his blind, desperate search for proof of life from the suite's other occupants. He breaks the eye contact, brow furrowing again, feeling suddenly ashamed.

"I, just...I woke up with this - feeling. I dunno how to describe it, it was like - haha, maybe I just had a bad dream or something, but everything just seemed so quiet and I felt like I had to check and see that I wasn't the only one here." He offers a self-deprecating chuckle. "I wasn't even really sure whose door I wound up at, at first." Don't thank me for anything, I'm not that great, I just stumbled my way into doing something right for a change.

Too many times now Sora has paid witness to this sort of self-deprecation from Jamie. Mostly in little ways, implications and off-hand comments, a laugh at his own expense. But they all add up, and it's easy for Sora to read. And it's painful because he doesn't think Jamie deserves that, not from himself or from anyone else. Sora has always been driven to make people happy, and with Jamie it also comes down to wanting him to see that he has more going for him than he thinks. He has a good sense of humor for one, and he clearly has the capacity for more compassion than he realizes. This instance is evidence of that. There's dedication and loyalty there too. He has drive and focus, he's goal-oriented. And clearly there's a desire to be a better person, to be the best person he can possibly be, otherwise there'd be no self-deprecation in the first place. There were all these things that were good about him and the potential for even more, and Sora just wishes there was a way he could make Jamie see that about himself.

And while Jamie doesn't think he showed up at Sora's door intentionally, Sora still thinks there was probably a stronger, subconscious force that brought him there. (Or, in specifically Sora terms: that Jamie was led by his heart.) Things rarely happened completely by accident. And it seemed too necessary that Jamie had ended up right where he was needed, when he was needed, by random chance alone.

His response to all of this is to hug him again, and there's still an affectionate smile there even if it's hidden from Jamie's view by the hug. "I'm really glad it was mine." His voice is quiet, and if his smile can't be seen at least it can clearly be heard. And whether it's the dimness of the room thanks to the sun still in the process of rising that makes him feel like it's safe to do so, that it won't embarrass Jamie, or it's the amount of overwhelming emotion that's been bombarding him since he woke up that drives him to do it, whatever the reason, he lets his heart speak on the underlying self-loathing he'd picked up on from his friend over the time he's known him. "You're a better person than you think... I'm happy we met. And I'm really lucky to have you as a friend."

The hug doesn't really startle him this time - in fact he almost welcomes it - and without too much hesitation at all, he returns the gesture. He was already half-hugging the guy already, after all, it doesn't take much to bring his other arm up and sort of absently pat Sora on the back.

It's what Sora says that takes him by surprise, and Jamie can't really describe why. It's not as though Sora's shy about expressing himself or reaching out to people, and as one of his bandmates Jamie is perhaps more privy to those aspects of his character than most; it's not even that his uncanny insight is anything surprising, because Jamie's recognized that about him too in the time they've known each other, even if he couldn't have described it in so many words. Maybe he's just never felt this vulnerable before, this laid bare in front of someone, like everything inside him's been spread out to look at, and while this would be an excruciating feeling around anyone else, with Sora...it's okay. He can let himself believe, finally, that Sora won't judge him or make fun of him or push him away for being a mixed-up, insecure teenager instead of the smooth, capable legal adult he tries so hard to be.

Being that he is an insecure teenager, of course, Jamie is sort of embarrassed by Sora's words, or maybe by the effect they have on him; he can't really think of what to say, at first, and when he finally does his throat feels tight and he doesn't know if he can get the words out without sounding like an idiot. But finally he huffs a little sort-of laugh into Sora's shoulder, swallows hard and says, "...I'm pretty lucky to have met you too."

The silence before he responds doesn't actually bother Sora. It's not like he'd said any of those things for the purpose of hearing something back anyway. He'd said them because he'd wanted them out there and for Jamie to hear them. There is no actual expectation for Jamie to respond. But that doesn't mean he isn't really happy to hear something back, anyway.

Whether he picks up on Jamie's embarrassment or not, he just tightens the hug slightly in his own response to Jamie's words. And then isn't quite sure what to do himself. Staying this way is nice though, and is his first instinct. There was something that just felt wonderfully safe about being close to someone after... whatever the heck it was he'd even been through, he still doesn't want to think on it too hard.

And yet his mind goes back to the messages on his phone, remembering the timestamps on them in his head. "Was I really only gone a few days?" He finally asks, voice quiet but curious. Still relieved, yet there remains a touch of sadness in it that he can't completely shake. He's relaxed, but there's a feeling that he's forgotten something important. "...It feels like a lot longer."

If he's going to be completely honest with himself, Jamie feels safer this way, too. Not just because he knows, in general, that someone else is around to help keep his loneliness at bay, but because this way he can be sure that Sora is where he should be - safely in the penthouse, not up in Lesedi's office or wherever he's been for the past few days. Whether he wants to admit it or not, the band is, if slowly, becoming more important to him than he might ever have thought.

"Seemed like a lot longer on this end, too." There, he admitted it, as if the panicked texts weren't indication enough: he missed Sora. "But...yeah, I guess it was only three days." He realizes how flippant, how dumb that sounds, and huffs into Sora's shoulder again before he pulls back to look him in the eye.

"Only three days. That's - that's long enough to file a missing persons report. That's when they start breaking out the dogs and search teams." He's...probably not really treating this with the dignity it deserves, but he's just feeling so much right now and he's still not sure how to deal with any of it.

He takes a second or two to try and pull himself together a little more, because he feels like he's on the verge of rambling. "...how much longer?" he asks finally. "I mean - how much longer does it feel like you were gone? Like...weeks, months?"

shhhh, we call it "hurt/comfort"

consocius - 2015-11-19 04:45 (UTC) - Expand

Jamie | Hope | Pride

A!! Sort of.

leave me here to die

can i run you over with more feels first

alwayyyys

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this tag is steeped in my tears i hope you are happy

I AM.

DWRP is the sport of sadisomasochists, LOOK HOW MUCH WE ENJOY ANGUISH

B

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